Tag Archives: love

The ice cream parlour

Several years had passed since the last time he had paced these paths. It brought back sweet and sour memories. Felt as if something was missing, the anguish was taking over.

Walk past it. It’s just nostalgia of this place, it will pass away.”, he lied to himself.

Nostalgia, a painful but beautiful word. Originating from Greek nostos (return home) and algos (pain). He was in pain that he had to return.

Treading the path, he saw that ice-cream parlour on the left. The place it had started all those years ago. A place full of cheerful people in groups of two or three. A place for budding friendships and love.

Love another awful word. Would you believe me if I said the word love shares root with Sanskrit lubhyati meaning desire? It could be lubhati in Hindi. So is love just desire, the need to have someone or something. Is the concept that love is above desires just another lie, just like her promises?

The beautiful vinyl wallpapers of orange had faded away. The place was empty, a staff hopeful on seeing him looking at the parlour. But he walked on.

So the place, where it had begun, had begun to wither away just like his love, the hopeful eyes of the staff reminded him of the hope he had that they would be together. They knew every moment they were together was just like stealing moments from someone else’s life. It was doomed to end this way, no amount of hope could keep them together. The world was acting against them.

He moved on towards the new place he had rented. If only I could have lived somewhere else, somewhere far from memories that were too painful to keep in the heart. The souvenirs of old aches and wounds were coming back.

He had to move on, walk past this place so often, he could learn to live with it.

Next time he walked past the ice-cream parlour, he kept his eyes straight. I am not going to look at it, pretend it doesn’t exist, pretend nothing happened.

And he walked past that place several times. One day he observed the place was under construction. So the place had died out just like his love.

Something new was to open up, something that will bring others closer and no one would remember that old ice cream place. No one would miss it.

Wonder what is going to open up.

A few days later, a donut place opened up. He got a coupon, buy one get one free. He had to go, he wasn’t going to miss this chance. Will he meet someone to share the free donut with? Is that what this new place brings?

To the bus bay

A different day indeed.
Finosys has been a land of fresh couple falling and learning to swim in love for the first time.
As I walked towards the bus bay, I saw a scene I had never seen before. A girl in teary voice yelling at the top of her voice at a boy much taller than her. She spoke in a language I hardly understood and didn’t want to hear at all at that moment. Her pitch and tone however spoke of a reply to the accusations the boy must have made.

So sad to have seen such a scene.

I moved ahead, the girls shrills had hardly left me when I saw a girl, tall and beautiful, rosy cheeks gazing at the boy walking together her with so much love and affection that it leaked. Her face gave a sense that there was no one in the wide world she would rather gaze.
The boy in return replying with a loving smile with his eyes.
I glanced downwards and saw them holding hands. Are they aware that they are holding hands or is it just second nature?
Had I ever held hands without knowing it?

But now that I sit to write this piece, more sinister thoughts move through me. How long will they be together?
Most love that blossom in Finy is like the white flowers that blossom in Finy’s vast lawns.
So beautiful, so numerous, and so fragile. The beautiful flowers that start blossoming with the coming of rain quickly wither away with a small drop in temperature. Lovers move apart, leave Finosys and leave the loved behind.
New people, new life await them else where.

Slaves of these pumps

Thinking back I remember how she flowed down the aisles. Tearing my heart out of my chest. Her smiles like blossoms.

You know I was not the smartest in the matter of these blood pumps. I knew her and felt something I couldn’t explain. I was sitting with her in her room, sharing our days. Oh yes, it was February the 14th. It was not because of love and neither because of attraction. It was like I had never done it before, I didn’t have a girlfriend. We didn’t have girlfriends in our days. For some reasons, she felt like the person to be with and without a sense and before I could talk myself out of it, I blurted it out. And guess what it was. It wasn’t “be my girlfriend” nor was it “I love you”. It was “will you marry me?”

This was just when we had begun our college. We went to different colleges. But we would meet at weekends and when we could. She was a good friend and close to me. She looked at me and stared. I looked into her eyes and fear rose in me that I would have to leave her gracious company. This was a mistake, I shouldn’t have said this. She kept looking.

Her lips quivered and she exhaled, “It is too early for us. Complete your college, finish your studies”. I couldn’t read her mind for mine was speeding to all thoughts.

I left her house that day and returned the next weekend. It was more of an impulse than real love that made me blurt out those words. I felt good that this mishap didn’t break our friendship. We talked, watched films and had the best days.

My engineering was coming to an end. I got a job through campus selection. I called her and told her.

Next day, I met her and exaggerated about how I had cracked the tough question at the interview and how I was among the few who got the job. She was calm for some reason and lost in thought. I was too occupied to notice at that time.

She moved next to me and said something. I looked at her puzzled. I wasn’t sure what she had said. It couldn’t be true, I must be mistaken.

She had proposed. And now was reminiscing how she spent long hours after I left, thinking about me and thinking of a life we could have together. I was distraught. My words from long ago had somehow taken root and from then she looked at me like I was hers. She didn’t know I had just blurted without thought.

Now it made sense that she was mad when I spoke of girls at my college and when I told her how I fancied that particular girl with rosy cheeks.

I said no. I didn’t have any other words. It’s amazing how much you could say and how much you manage to do. I left her there. Sitting on that chair next to the old table where we had spent several years doing our homework.

It was a loss. I couldn’t bear what my dumbness had done. Brought pain. I went home and messaged her something. She replied and I replied. This went on all night. It was the first time we had done this. We messaged all the time but this was different. We had never messaged through the night nor shared our hearts this way.

We messaged all day and all night. No one at home seemed to notice. We did the same thing the next day. Then something moved in my mind and I remembered I had said no.

Somewhere deep in my heart, I thought I was better than this, than her. I was an engineer, had a job in the most favoured company. Not to sound like a pig with a big ego but I felt I could find someone better. She wasn’t my destiny.

I stopped replying. She sent message after message. I didn’t reply.

My ego had taken a hold. She stopped. To this day, I wonder what she felt for she wouldn’t share those days with me. I left the city and was kept engaged with my new life. My new life was great. Away from home and all binds, I was the king of my life. All thoughts of her and her pain left me.

A couple of years later, I had made my mark and was soaring through my career. I was soon chosen to go to US for my job. Something I wanted for long.

Before I left the country, I went home to spend a few days with your grandparents. One day she came to my house. I felt guilty for not going to meet her. It was a long time since we had spoken. We had drifted apart.

The childhood friendship was weakened by the coming of youth. I saw the love in her eyes again. I acted as though I didn’t notice. We spoke and laughed. It was hard to sit in the room with her. She left.

The night before I left for US, she came to bid me bye. She and I found ourselves alone. We were silent. She spoke softly, “can’t you marry me? You know my parents have started searching”. I thought, how her life would change. How she would need to quit her government job and come with me to US and become a housewife. Leave her passion and life behind.

I was saved from telling her anything. The taxi had arrived and it was time to go.

What would have I said? Yes, I wish nothing else or no, don’t be stupid. Was it my ego that I could find someone else? Or was it a fear of what would happen? I didn’t want to discomfort by asking her to change her life and her job.

Before I could finish the story, my wife entered and told the kids off. It was time for them to sleep. And for me to lie away in my bed.

- Adapted from words of ....... May the name be never disclosed.